Muito calor mesmo, não apetece fazer nada.
Apetece é estar na praia. (por praia entenda-se esplanada)
Crucifies my enemies....
segunda-feira, julho 30, 2007
quarta-feira, julho 25, 2007
terça-feira, julho 24, 2007
Bem...
Não me tem apetecido muito.
Mas tenho de fazer um pequeno reparo, bem ah e tal e era. Mas era mesmo. Assim tipo bué....
Mas tenho de fazer um pequeno reparo, bem ah e tal e era. Mas era mesmo. Assim tipo bué....
quinta-feira, julho 19, 2007
Boa viagem.
A todos os que se dirigem a Faro nestes dias, muito boa viagem, divirtam-se e são capazes ainda de ver Motorhead!
Cuidado na estrada o importante é ir de A a B, divirtir-se, e voltar de B a A!!!!!
Cuidado na estrada o importante é ir de A a B, divirtir-se, e voltar de B a A!!!!!
Actualizações.
Não há noticias da porcaria do concurso. Vou ao Minho este fim de semana. Os radares impedem que os comboios da linha de Cascais andem acima do legalmente permitido, para carros.
E assim vai o nosso país.
Tenho de fazer a revisão à Carolina.
Tenho de ganhar pachorra para trabalhar.
E agora tenho de actualizar as efemérides!
Dia 7
Never - Weather balloon discovered near Roswell.
Dia 8
2006 - An enraged mob attacks Tom Cruise, force-feeds him 12 bottles of Paxil, then beats him for taking too many damn people to work.
Dia 9
20 - As Jesus is being crucified he is quoted as saying "I get knocked down / But I get up again / You're never going to keep me down". This later became a hit classic by Jeus Ft The Disciples when indeed he did get up again the next day.
Dia 10
6000 B.C. - As per the Bible, the Earth begins moving for the first time.
DIa 11
1975 - The Florida parliament passes a law decreeing the wearing of gloves during the Smelling Time.
Dia 12
2000 - George W. Bush fucked us all.
Dia 13
2010 - Iraq invaded by america for the 26th time
Dia 14
1985 - Nicolas Blanchet, a highly recognized engineer and policy-maker from the University of Pennsylvania, was born. Before Nicolas started his acadmeic studies at UPenn, he developed a stable modeling career, making him the first engineer/model of his kind.
Dia 15
1478 - International Letter Committee declares 1479 "'I' Conservation Year"
1479 - nternatonal Letter Commttee declares 1480 "'O' Conservaton Year"
1480 - nternatnal Letter Cmmttee declares 1481 "'N' Cnservatn Year"
1481 - teratal Letter Cmmttee declares 1482 "'R' Cservat Year"
1482 - teatal Lette Cmmttee declaes 1483 "'C' Csevat Yea"
1483 - All International Letter Committee members assassinated, Б reinstated
Dia 16
2005 - Hey guess what! Eh, I'll tell you eventually.
Dia 17
999,999,999,999,999 bc - Nothing, God had yet to finish college
Dia 18
15 - Jesus Christ invents the lawnomwer.
25 - The lawn is invented by the Romans.
33 - Romans crucify Jesus Christ in order to solve copyright issues on lawn.
Dia 19
2623 - The year 2623 is warped backwards in time. Nobody understands how.
E assim vai o nosso país.
Tenho de fazer a revisão à Carolina.
Tenho de ganhar pachorra para trabalhar.
E agora tenho de actualizar as efemérides!
Dia 7
Never - Weather balloon discovered near Roswell.
Dia 8
2006 - An enraged mob attacks Tom Cruise, force-feeds him 12 bottles of Paxil, then beats him for taking too many damn people to work.
Dia 9
20 - As Jesus is being crucified he is quoted as saying "I get knocked down / But I get up again / You're never going to keep me down". This later became a hit classic by Jeus Ft The Disciples when indeed he did get up again the next day.
Dia 10
6000 B.C. - As per the Bible, the Earth begins moving for the first time.
DIa 11
1975 - The Florida parliament passes a law decreeing the wearing of gloves during the Smelling Time.
Dia 12
2000 - George W. Bush fucked us all.
Dia 13
2010 - Iraq invaded by america for the 26th time
Dia 14
1985 - Nicolas Blanchet, a highly recognized engineer and policy-maker from the University of Pennsylvania, was born. Before Nicolas started his acadmeic studies at UPenn, he developed a stable modeling career, making him the first engineer/model of his kind.
Dia 15
1478 - International Letter Committee declares 1479 "'I' Conservation Year"
1479 - nternatonal Letter Commttee declares 1480 "'O' Conservaton Year"
1480 - nternatnal Letter Cmmttee declares 1481 "'N' Cnservatn Year"
1481 - teratal Letter Cmmttee declares 1482 "'R' Cservat Year"
1482 - teatal Lette Cmmttee declaes 1483 "'C' Csevat Yea"
1483 - All International Letter Committee members assassinated, Б reinstated
Dia 16
2005 - Hey guess what! Eh, I'll tell you eventually.
Dia 17
999,999,999,999,999 bc - Nothing, God had yet to finish college
Dia 18
15 - Jesus Christ invents the lawnomwer.
25 - The lawn is invented by the Romans.
33 - Romans crucify Jesus Christ in order to solve copyright issues on lawn.
Dia 19
2623 - The year 2623 is warped backwards in time. Nobody understands how.
segunda-feira, julho 16, 2007
quinta-feira, julho 12, 2007
Interrompe-se
o período sabático para:
Ponto 1 - PARABÉNS!!!! QUE TUDO CORRA BEM DAQUI PARA A FRENTE!!!!
Ponto 2 - Mãezinha do céu...... que..... ufffff..... é mau é!
Ponto 1 - PARABÉNS!!!! QUE TUDO CORRA BEM DAQUI PARA A FRENTE!!!!
Ponto 2 - Mãezinha do céu...... que..... ufffff..... é mau é!
sexta-feira, julho 06, 2007
Sexta
A primeira depois de férias.
Tudo igual, à excepção do calor.
Dia 5
2006 - Zombies become extinct.
Dia 6
1946 - George W. Bush born; record numbers of brain death recorded in America.
Tudo igual, à excepção do calor.
Dia 5
2006 - Zombies become extinct.
Dia 6
1946 - George W. Bush born; record numbers of brain death recorded in America.
quinta-feira, julho 05, 2007
E foi de vez
Não me apetecia escrever hoje, mas tem de ser.
Olivier Jacque vai por um ponto final na sua carreira, anunciou em comunicado. O piloto de 34 anos vai ser substituído por Anthony West.
“Desde as primeiras corridas deste ano, tenho sido vítima de diversas quedas que se saldaram por graves lesões nas costas, na cervical e no antebraço direito”, declarou o piloto.
"Sinto-me fatigado e diminuído psicologicamente. Tenho recuperado mal das minhas lesões e não me sinto com capacidades para correr a alto nível. Dei muito de mim a este desporto, mas o meu corpo tocou a campaínha de alarme e é, porventura, tempo de virar a página”, acrescentou.
O director da equipa, Ichiro Yoda, revelou que teve medo “depois do último acidente de Olivier. Pedi-lhe para desistir enquanto piloto e ajudar-nos de outra maneira”.
O francês revelou que passará a ser piloto de testes e conselheiro técnico da sua equipa, a Kawasaki Racing Team.
O seu substituto no campeonato, Anthony West, correu nas 50cc durante 14 corridas em 2001, e está nas 250cc actualmente. Conhecido como “homem da chuva”, devido à sua habilidade para correr em piso molhado, o piloto de 25 anos disse que “tem sido um sonho competir nas MotoGP numa moto de fábrica”
E acabou de vez agora.
Olivier Jacque vai por um ponto final na sua carreira, anunciou em comunicado. O piloto de 34 anos vai ser substituído por Anthony West.
“Desde as primeiras corridas deste ano, tenho sido vítima de diversas quedas que se saldaram por graves lesões nas costas, na cervical e no antebraço direito”, declarou o piloto.
"Sinto-me fatigado e diminuído psicologicamente. Tenho recuperado mal das minhas lesões e não me sinto com capacidades para correr a alto nível. Dei muito de mim a este desporto, mas o meu corpo tocou a campaínha de alarme e é, porventura, tempo de virar a página”, acrescentou.
O director da equipa, Ichiro Yoda, revelou que teve medo “depois do último acidente de Olivier. Pedi-lhe para desistir enquanto piloto e ajudar-nos de outra maneira”.
O francês revelou que passará a ser piloto de testes e conselheiro técnico da sua equipa, a Kawasaki Racing Team.
O seu substituto no campeonato, Anthony West, correu nas 50cc durante 14 corridas em 2001, e está nas 250cc actualmente. Conhecido como “homem da chuva”, devido à sua habilidade para correr em piso molhado, o piloto de 25 anos disse que “tem sido um sonho competir nas MotoGP numa moto de fábrica”
E acabou de vez agora.
quarta-feira, julho 04, 2007
Complicadinho este....
Como alguns, nem tudo pode ser um mar de rosas.
Mas já passou.
Folgo em saber que pelos vistos estás no bom caminho. Seria um desperdício realmente, e já que eu não posso aproveitar, pelo menos alguém que tenha esse privilégio!
Dia 4
2007 - You sit at a computer. Why not go outside and get some fresh air? And watch the stars, the sky, and that huge metal ball that somehow didn't hit that comet but changed his path towards you. Yeah, it's following you. Get an umbrella or go to the subways.
Mas já passou.
Folgo em saber que pelos vistos estás no bom caminho. Seria um desperdício realmente, e já que eu não posso aproveitar, pelo menos alguém que tenha esse privilégio!
Dia 4
2007 - You sit at a computer. Why not go outside and get some fresh air? And watch the stars, the sky, and that huge metal ball that somehow didn't hit that comet but changed his path towards you. Yeah, it's following you. Get an umbrella or go to the subways.
terça-feira, julho 03, 2007
Acho...
Que o Bitó está prestes a dizer adeus à vida....
Dia 3
2006 - It transpires that washing machines live longer with catsup, and not Calgon.
Dia 3
2006 - It transpires that washing machines live longer with catsup, and not Calgon.
segunda-feira, julho 02, 2007
Considerações
Bem, e por agora apenas considerações superficiais.
Portugal:
O país que por pior que esteja, por pior que o considerem, por mais que nos chule, por mais que digamos que é mau, é meu e não troco por nenhum. Mas há muito a melhorar, muito mesmo. Se bem que o pior não se muda, somos portugueses e não há nada a fazer. Isto não é resignar-me a uma condição, é facto assumido.
Mas dos poucos quilómetros feitos no nosso país, nada a reclamar, a não ser as portagens, o pré-pagamento nas bombas e a distância que para lá é longa, mas depois encurta substâncialmente. Deve ter sido do hábito.
Espanha:
Tirando os 20km depois de Fuentes de Oñoro, e os 100 (ou quase) de nacional até Vitória-Gasteiz, nada a apontar, tirando o facto de serem espanhois e de nada, como nos acontece, os poder fazer alterar tal nefasta, não como nós, condição.
San Sebastian estava lindíssima como sempre, o parque melhorado por os marroquino ou magrebi ou seja lá o que for não se encontrava presente. Os preços sem alterações em 2 anos, o que é bom.
França:
Começando logo bem, mais uma vez me desorientei em Hendaya, encontrado o caminho foi sempre a andar, tanto que só parei na Alemanha. O regresso foi manifestamente mais positivo, quer pelos sítios que passei, quer por ver de novo Paris e aprender que afinal aquilo não é só bonito, CARROS NÃO FALTAM!
Revisitei o Futureoscope em Poitiers, revisitei Tours, Paris, o vale do Somme (algo que tenho de repetir), a terra do Alexandre Dumas. Uma ida e volta cujo o expoente máximo foi um obstáculo à circulação chamado veado. (mal eu sabia do que se passaria a seguir).
Bélgica:
Tem Hoegaarden, tem casas de putas, tem estradas más, tem gasolineiras que fecham às 6 e não aceitam cartões, tem gente antipática. Tirando a cerveja, o mais positivo que tem é o facto de existirem N fronteiras para sair de lá.
Holanda:
Fui parte dos 1% que a visita e não vai a Amsterdão. Nem a Eindhoven, nem a Roterdão. Mas fui a Maastricht. Bicicletas a monte. Os primeiros 10m são engraçados, passando tal período começam a tornar-se bastante irritantes. Tirando o facto do selim favorecer, quando se pedala, a fisionomia feminina. Tiradas fotos de erva e de tulipas. E mais não houve.
Alemanha:
Tudo positivo. A alegre surpresa da viagem. A fantástica surpresa da viagem, melhor dizendo. Tudo o que encontrei, quando não mais barato, era o mesmo preço que neste cantinho à beira-mar plantado. Pessoas, bem, simpatia até dizer chega, prestáveis e acima de tudo sorridentes no seu trabalho. Auto-Estradas sem limite de velocidade (ou poucas vezes limitadas, Nacionais bastante rígidas e altamente controladas, o que se compreende.)
Dinamarca:
25€ de depósito para a atravessar, três pontes magníficas, verde, chuvosa, um bocado marados no volante, obras com data prevista ao dia para execução, não tem a gasolina mais cara da Europa.
Suécia:
Tudo de bom. Sem nada a apontar. Pessoas, estradas, sítios para ficar, preços acessíveis. Mas acima de tudo a simpatia das pessoas toca bastante. País a visitar de novo, e um dos favoritos.
Finlândia:
Muito parecido com a imagem que tenho da URSS nos anos 70. Mas talvez seja da parte que visitei, mais a norte. Novamente pessoas fenomenais, prestáveis, preços mais baixos que nos colegas escandinavos, e em euros....
Noruega:
Frio. Muito. Gelo. Renas. Muitas. Socialmente continua na senda dos colegas escandinavos. Estradas nacionais iguais às nossas, preços um pouco mais altos. Tive em Alta.
E claro, o Nordkapp.
Mais a seguir quando me apetecer.
Portugal:
O país que por pior que esteja, por pior que o considerem, por mais que nos chule, por mais que digamos que é mau, é meu e não troco por nenhum. Mas há muito a melhorar, muito mesmo. Se bem que o pior não se muda, somos portugueses e não há nada a fazer. Isto não é resignar-me a uma condição, é facto assumido.
Mas dos poucos quilómetros feitos no nosso país, nada a reclamar, a não ser as portagens, o pré-pagamento nas bombas e a distância que para lá é longa, mas depois encurta substâncialmente. Deve ter sido do hábito.
Espanha:
Tirando os 20km depois de Fuentes de Oñoro, e os 100 (ou quase) de nacional até Vitória-Gasteiz, nada a apontar, tirando o facto de serem espanhois e de nada, como nos acontece, os poder fazer alterar tal nefasta, não como nós, condição.
San Sebastian estava lindíssima como sempre, o parque melhorado por os marroquino ou magrebi ou seja lá o que for não se encontrava presente. Os preços sem alterações em 2 anos, o que é bom.
França:
Começando logo bem, mais uma vez me desorientei em Hendaya, encontrado o caminho foi sempre a andar, tanto que só parei na Alemanha. O regresso foi manifestamente mais positivo, quer pelos sítios que passei, quer por ver de novo Paris e aprender que afinal aquilo não é só bonito, CARROS NÃO FALTAM!
Revisitei o Futureoscope em Poitiers, revisitei Tours, Paris, o vale do Somme (algo que tenho de repetir), a terra do Alexandre Dumas. Uma ida e volta cujo o expoente máximo foi um obstáculo à circulação chamado veado. (mal eu sabia do que se passaria a seguir).
Bélgica:
Tem Hoegaarden, tem casas de putas, tem estradas más, tem gasolineiras que fecham às 6 e não aceitam cartões, tem gente antipática. Tirando a cerveja, o mais positivo que tem é o facto de existirem N fronteiras para sair de lá.
Holanda:
Fui parte dos 1% que a visita e não vai a Amsterdão. Nem a Eindhoven, nem a Roterdão. Mas fui a Maastricht. Bicicletas a monte. Os primeiros 10m são engraçados, passando tal período começam a tornar-se bastante irritantes. Tirando o facto do selim favorecer, quando se pedala, a fisionomia feminina. Tiradas fotos de erva e de tulipas. E mais não houve.
Alemanha:
Tudo positivo. A alegre surpresa da viagem. A fantástica surpresa da viagem, melhor dizendo. Tudo o que encontrei, quando não mais barato, era o mesmo preço que neste cantinho à beira-mar plantado. Pessoas, bem, simpatia até dizer chega, prestáveis e acima de tudo sorridentes no seu trabalho. Auto-Estradas sem limite de velocidade (ou poucas vezes limitadas, Nacionais bastante rígidas e altamente controladas, o que se compreende.)
Dinamarca:
25€ de depósito para a atravessar, três pontes magníficas, verde, chuvosa, um bocado marados no volante, obras com data prevista ao dia para execução, não tem a gasolina mais cara da Europa.
Suécia:
Tudo de bom. Sem nada a apontar. Pessoas, estradas, sítios para ficar, preços acessíveis. Mas acima de tudo a simpatia das pessoas toca bastante. País a visitar de novo, e um dos favoritos.
Finlândia:
Muito parecido com a imagem que tenho da URSS nos anos 70. Mas talvez seja da parte que visitei, mais a norte. Novamente pessoas fenomenais, prestáveis, preços mais baixos que nos colegas escandinavos, e em euros....
Noruega:
Frio. Muito. Gelo. Renas. Muitas. Socialmente continua na senda dos colegas escandinavos. Estradas nacionais iguais às nossas, preços um pouco mais altos. Tive em Alta.
E claro, o Nordkapp.
Mais a seguir quando me apetecer.
Hello
Ainda sem me alongar em considerações sobre, estou de volta ao muito trabalho que acumulou....
Bem e por isso segue-se a actual estopada
Dia 5
1973 - Henry Kissinger mistakenly orders the CIA to overthrow the government of Chile. The original idea was to overthrown China's government. Later that day, Kissinger declared "Oops" to the media.
Dia 6
6666 BC - Happy Birthday, Satan!
6665 BC - Happy Birthday, Santa!
Dia 7
8 - Portuguese scientists invent the first electric toaster.
Dia 8
1963 - Doctor What changes his name to Doctor Who.
Dia 9
1969 - Sex is created. However, scientists do not think it will be a big hit.
Dia 10
31964 BC - World population reaches 15.
Dia 11
2005 - Uncyclopedia users baffled by the words 'Ontological', 'Empiricism', and by some, 'Day'. Due to that, no one knows what to write about.
Dia 12
1987 - In Chernobyl, Russian Emperor Mikhail Gorbachev accidentally misflosses an Elephant during the Chernobyl Elephant Flossing Day Annual Festival. As a result, reactor #2 at the Chernobyl nuclear flossing plant explodes, killing 42 people and injuring one elephant.
Dia 13
2107 - MTV is, according to several prophecies, going to show a good musicvideo. But its very unlikely.
Dia 14
2002 - Mel Gibson and Chuck Norris finish filming their critically acclaimed action/comedy buddy film, "The Laundry Room", where Chuck Norris plays a retired, alcoholic laundromat owner while Mel Gibson plays a slightly less retired and slightly less alchoholic laundromat owner. During the filming of the movie Gibson beat the sissy pants off of Norris for, "Being a little bitch," and this drove Norris to learn the art of Karate. He is now known to be one of the greatest fighters in the world and Mel Brooks is on his hit list. This drove Mel Gibson to produce the movie, "The Passion of the Christ", which, in fact, is a portrayal of what Gibson would do to Norris if Norris even came close to Gibson. The film is NOT a portrayal of the death of Jesus Christ as so many would believe. What gives way to the former theory is the phrase written in the ending credits stating, "Norris, if you even come close to me this shit is gonna happen to your ass!" Tensions have risen between Gibson and Norris ever since.
Dia 15
Ig-pay Atin-lay Ay-day
1975 - Angelina-ay Olie-jay is-ay orn-bay in-ay Uuk-nay, Eenland-gray. Er-hay Eskimo-ay eritage-hay accounts-ay or-fay er-hay ood-gay ooks-lay.
Dia 16
1846 - Pius IX is elected pope on the strength of his fetching rendition of the Macarena. Through similar means he later secures successive terms in office and becomes the longest-reigning pope since the days of St. Peter's last miracle.
Dia 17
1878 - Mount Everest built by Nepal to encourage tourism growth and annoy Tibet
Dia 18
1111 - Darth Hitler is constructed by the Knights Templar by mistake.
Dia 19
1138 - George Lucas devises the evil world conquering plan of THX.
Dia 20
2006 - Uncyclopedia writer is shot while typi
Dia 21
1138 - First Ikea opened in Durham by Viking invaders
Dia 22
1941 - Nazi Germany invades Jane Fonda in Operation Barbarella.
Dia 23
2009 - Global Warming will freeze over Iraq and it will become a giant ice hockey rink for the newly formed, Iraqi rebels.
Dia 24
2007 - The end of the world. Or not.
Dia 25
33 B. C. - The Anti-Christ is born in the City of Anti-David in an anti-manger to an anti-virgin.
Dia 26
1 million BC - Cthulhu invents Christmas, when bored.
Dia 27
1852 - Nietzsche publishes his first book in ebonics, titled "Derzizzle Antichristizzle".
Dia 28
2006 - Scholars discover the first gay couple, Adam and Steve, in Israel. In other news, it's the god damn doodly best day ever because Maddox visited Chicago.
Dia 29
1832 - The cock is adopted as the national emblem of Portugal.
Dia 30
1789 - The end of June moved to the 30th after spending the previous 5 centuries at the 14th of June.
Dia 1
1985 - Battle of Little Bighorn begins. Custer makes last stand, but is totally destroyed by the Nazis
Dia 2
1967 - Some people were born and some people died.
Bem e por isso segue-se a actual estopada
Dia 5
1973 - Henry Kissinger mistakenly orders the CIA to overthrow the government of Chile. The original idea was to overthrown China's government. Later that day, Kissinger declared "Oops" to the media.
Dia 6
6666 BC - Happy Birthday, Satan!
6665 BC - Happy Birthday, Santa!
Dia 7
8 - Portuguese scientists invent the first electric toaster.
Dia 8
1963 - Doctor What changes his name to Doctor Who.
Dia 9
1969 - Sex is created. However, scientists do not think it will be a big hit.
Dia 10
31964 BC - World population reaches 15.
Dia 11
2005 - Uncyclopedia users baffled by the words 'Ontological', 'Empiricism', and by some, 'Day'. Due to that, no one knows what to write about.
Dia 12
1987 - In Chernobyl, Russian Emperor Mikhail Gorbachev accidentally misflosses an Elephant during the Chernobyl Elephant Flossing Day Annual Festival. As a result, reactor #2 at the Chernobyl nuclear flossing plant explodes, killing 42 people and injuring one elephant.
Dia 13
2107 - MTV is, according to several prophecies, going to show a good musicvideo. But its very unlikely.
Dia 14
2002 - Mel Gibson and Chuck Norris finish filming their critically acclaimed action/comedy buddy film, "The Laundry Room", where Chuck Norris plays a retired, alcoholic laundromat owner while Mel Gibson plays a slightly less retired and slightly less alchoholic laundromat owner. During the filming of the movie Gibson beat the sissy pants off of Norris for, "Being a little bitch," and this drove Norris to learn the art of Karate. He is now known to be one of the greatest fighters in the world and Mel Brooks is on his hit list. This drove Mel Gibson to produce the movie, "The Passion of the Christ", which, in fact, is a portrayal of what Gibson would do to Norris if Norris even came close to Gibson. The film is NOT a portrayal of the death of Jesus Christ as so many would believe. What gives way to the former theory is the phrase written in the ending credits stating, "Norris, if you even come close to me this shit is gonna happen to your ass!" Tensions have risen between Gibson and Norris ever since.
Dia 15
Ig-pay Atin-lay Ay-day
1975 - Angelina-ay Olie-jay is-ay orn-bay in-ay Uuk-nay, Eenland-gray. Er-hay Eskimo-ay eritage-hay accounts-ay or-fay er-hay ood-gay ooks-lay.
Dia 16
1846 - Pius IX is elected pope on the strength of his fetching rendition of the Macarena. Through similar means he later secures successive terms in office and becomes the longest-reigning pope since the days of St. Peter's last miracle.
Dia 17
1878 - Mount Everest built by Nepal to encourage tourism growth and annoy Tibet
Dia 18
1111 - Darth Hitler is constructed by the Knights Templar by mistake.
Dia 19
1138 - George Lucas devises the evil world conquering plan of THX.
Dia 20
2006 - Uncyclopedia writer is shot while typi
Dia 21
1138 - First Ikea opened in Durham by Viking invaders
Dia 22
1941 - Nazi Germany invades Jane Fonda in Operation Barbarella.
Dia 23
2009 - Global Warming will freeze over Iraq and it will become a giant ice hockey rink for the newly formed, Iraqi rebels.
Dia 24
2007 - The end of the world. Or not.
Dia 25
33 B. C. - The Anti-Christ is born in the City of Anti-David in an anti-manger to an anti-virgin.
Dia 26
1 million BC - Cthulhu invents Christmas, when bored.
Dia 27
1852 - Nietzsche publishes his first book in ebonics, titled "Derzizzle Antichristizzle".
Dia 28
2006 - Scholars discover the first gay couple, Adam and Steve, in Israel. In other news, it's the god damn doodly best day ever because Maddox visited Chicago.
Dia 29
1832 - The cock is adopted as the national emblem of Portugal.
Dia 30
1789 - The end of June moved to the 30th after spending the previous 5 centuries at the 14th of June.
Dia 1
1985 - Battle of Little Bighorn begins. Custer makes last stand, but is totally destroyed by the Nazis
Dia 2
1967 - Some people were born and some people died.
terça-feira, junho 26, 2007
segunda-feira, junho 04, 2007
Por razões
Alheias à minha pessoa, tive de gastar dois dias de férias. Não foi, pelo motivo, agradável, mas terá de ser. Só espero é que a situação não influencie a partida. Esperemos que não.
Mas daqui já me despeço.
Com uma frase que estou há 5 anos a querer dizer.
"Adeusinho, vou alí à Noruega de mota e já volto..."
Dia 2
2001 - The first HAL9000 supercomputer was recalled by manufacturer Itsa Bigga Machine, eh?
Dia 3
1599 - Birthdate of Lord Alvin Redund, which was also the day he was born, being Lord Alvin Redund, the inventor of redundancy which has much in common with, but also pertaining to and related to redundancy and it was on this day June 3rd, 1599 that he was born, that day was his birthday.
1599 - Birthdate of Lord Alvin Redund, which was also the day he was born, being Lord Alvin Redund, the inventor of redundancy which has much in common with, but also pertaining to and related to redundancy and it was on this day June 3rd, 1599 that he was born, that day was his birthday.
Dia 4
1942 - The Battle of Midway begins with a surprise attack on Konami.
Mas daqui já me despeço.
Com uma frase que estou há 5 anos a querer dizer.
"Adeusinho, vou alí à Noruega de mota e já volto..."
Dia 2
2001 - The first HAL9000 supercomputer was recalled by manufacturer Itsa Bigga Machine, eh?
Dia 3
1599 - Birthdate of Lord Alvin Redund, which was also the day he was born, being Lord Alvin Redund, the inventor of redundancy which has much in common with, but also pertaining to and related to redundancy and it was on this day June 3rd, 1599 that he was born, that day was his birthday.
1599 - Birthdate of Lord Alvin Redund, which was also the day he was born, being Lord Alvin Redund, the inventor of redundancy which has much in common with, but also pertaining to and related to redundancy and it was on this day June 3rd, 1599 that he was born, that day was his birthday.
Dia 4
1942 - The Battle of Midway begins with a surprise attack on Konami.
sexta-feira, junho 01, 2007
Murphy's Law
(Artigo, obviamente, retirado da
“Insert quote here....errrrrrrrrm what quote... do that...”
~ The One Most Corrupted on more quotes
“ Murphy was awfully pessimistic”
~ Captain Obvious on Murphy
Murphy's Law is one of the fundamental laws of nature, even more fundamental than, for example, the law of copyright. It is a very optimistic law, stating if anything can go wrong, it will.
The law has many variants, e.g.:
Someone else will always get the last ice cream.
When a farang (foreign person) gets married to a woman from Thailand, and he later finds out that she was a man (katoey). Even if the Thai woman is actually a woman, she may have many flaws, such as laziness, very demanding, stubborn, and only marries for money and not for love.
When one attempts to hit a nail, one will always hit one's finger.
It is always sunny on Wednesday afternoons.
It always rains outside.
Toast will always fall with the buttered side down.
And you can never tell the right side of the toast to butter.
When one searches with a search engine, one ends up on Wikipedia, not on Uncyclopedia.
When you are looking for something that is in a pile, it is always next to the grue.
The grue will eat you if you touch it.
When waiting in line, the line you're in will move quickest, but you will break your leg while waiting.
Or, your line will be the slowest and you will still break your leg.
If you like women, chances are, you're a lesbian.
When teasing scorpions, they will always transpire to have a masochistic streak and actually develop an affection for you for having done so.
All your base, indeed, are belong to us.
If you flip to the Comedy channel, you get Sinbad's comedy hour.
If you like pina coladas, you most likely won't get caught in the rain (and vice versa)
any tool dropped while repairing a car will roll to the exact center (or anyplace out of reach) under the car.
a Smith&Wesson always beats four aces.
never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
a coin dropped while sitting on a couch will lodge itself in the only place you think not to look.
If you are a student and you studied 99chapters out of hundred, then your whole exam will only come from the one chapter you left.
Murphy's Law was discovered and informalized by Albert Murphy Sinbad Einstein, after whom it was named. Albert came to the idea when he was bathing under a tree, and an apple landed exactly on the hot tap. This incident also led to the invention of hot water.
The law was passed without any votes against, critics mention that anyone who would oppose had missed his or her plane, had an engine failure or hit both nail and finger with a hammer. Those for the law cite the same incidents.
A prime Example of Murphy's Law can be found in the everyday life of an unfortunate idiot named Pete Thomas. This inevitably proves this law.Link title
Contents [hide]
1 Murphy's second law
2 Murphy's third law
3 Murphy's Law, redux
4 Amendments to Murphy's Laws
5 Murphy's Paradox
[edit] Murphy's second law
Yo mamma
[edit] Murphy's third law
Murphy was on crack to think the first law, and either law #2 or #3 is completely false. But #1 looks even more false. Murphy did all he could to prove the 4th law, but failed. Was that a proof or a disproof? This depends on whether *you* wanted the law to fail or not.
[edit] Murphy's Law, redux
Murphy, short for David Bowie, is an influential Irish politician. He's credited with another version of Murphy's Law, one that requires Murphy's Irish Red be imbibed at least once daily, twice on Friday. The law was passed without any votes against, critics mention that anyone who would oppose had been out on town the night before, and in a Murphy's induced stupor. Those for the law cite the same incident.
Einstein enjoys a good Murphy's, and packaging will change in the near future to reflect his posthumous endorsement of the brew.
Incidentally, Murphy's was also invented in a bath.
[edit] Amendments to Murphy's Laws
The First Amendment
If anything can go wrong it sometimes can and possibly will.
The Second Amendment
Thou shalt sometimes miss the first bus, and usually have to wait half an hour for the next one to arrive.
thurd amendamint
if zoo heet your zelf un ze heeed weeth a freyin paan zu weel bezomme stupeeder and stupderr. theiz waz foist tezsted ooon tha whitar oof thezi farticle pection.
[edit] Murphy's Paradox
Murphy's Law says that if anything can go wrong, it will. But, this stupid law applies to itself: itself can go wrong, that is, there must be a situation where something can go wrong and it won't go wrong. So, Murphy Law is paradoxal, and by reductio ad absurdun, it is bullshit.
Retrieved from "http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Murphy%27s_Law"
“Insert quote here....errrrrrrrrm what quote... do that...”
~ The One Most Corrupted on more quotes
“ Murphy was awfully pessimistic”
~ Captain Obvious on Murphy
Murphy's Law is one of the fundamental laws of nature, even more fundamental than, for example, the law of copyright. It is a very optimistic law, stating if anything can go wrong, it will.
The law has many variants, e.g.:
Someone else will always get the last ice cream.
When a farang (foreign person) gets married to a woman from Thailand, and he later finds out that she was a man (katoey). Even if the Thai woman is actually a woman, she may have many flaws, such as laziness, very demanding, stubborn, and only marries for money and not for love.
When one attempts to hit a nail, one will always hit one's finger.
It is always sunny on Wednesday afternoons.
It always rains outside.
Toast will always fall with the buttered side down.
And you can never tell the right side of the toast to butter.
When one searches with a search engine, one ends up on Wikipedia, not on Uncyclopedia.
When you are looking for something that is in a pile, it is always next to the grue.
The grue will eat you if you touch it.
When waiting in line, the line you're in will move quickest, but you will break your leg while waiting.
Or, your line will be the slowest and you will still break your leg.
If you like women, chances are, you're a lesbian.
When teasing scorpions, they will always transpire to have a masochistic streak and actually develop an affection for you for having done so.
All your base, indeed, are belong to us.
If you flip to the Comedy channel, you get Sinbad's comedy hour.
If you like pina coladas, you most likely won't get caught in the rain (and vice versa)
any tool dropped while repairing a car will roll to the exact center (or anyplace out of reach) under the car.
a Smith&Wesson always beats four aces.
never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
a coin dropped while sitting on a couch will lodge itself in the only place you think not to look.
If you are a student and you studied 99chapters out of hundred, then your whole exam will only come from the one chapter you left.
Murphy's Law was discovered and informalized by Albert Murphy Sinbad Einstein, after whom it was named. Albert came to the idea when he was bathing under a tree, and an apple landed exactly on the hot tap. This incident also led to the invention of hot water.
The law was passed without any votes against, critics mention that anyone who would oppose had missed his or her plane, had an engine failure or hit both nail and finger with a hammer. Those for the law cite the same incidents.
A prime Example of Murphy's Law can be found in the everyday life of an unfortunate idiot named Pete Thomas. This inevitably proves this law.Link title
Contents [hide]
1 Murphy's second law
2 Murphy's third law
3 Murphy's Law, redux
4 Amendments to Murphy's Laws
5 Murphy's Paradox
[edit] Murphy's second law
Yo mamma
[edit] Murphy's third law
Murphy was on crack to think the first law, and either law #2 or #3 is completely false. But #1 looks even more false. Murphy did all he could to prove the 4th law, but failed. Was that a proof or a disproof? This depends on whether *you* wanted the law to fail or not.
[edit] Murphy's Law, redux
Murphy, short for David Bowie, is an influential Irish politician. He's credited with another version of Murphy's Law, one that requires Murphy's Irish Red be imbibed at least once daily, twice on Friday. The law was passed without any votes against, critics mention that anyone who would oppose had been out on town the night before, and in a Murphy's induced stupor. Those for the law cite the same incident.
Einstein enjoys a good Murphy's, and packaging will change in the near future to reflect his posthumous endorsement of the brew.
Incidentally, Murphy's was also invented in a bath.
[edit] Amendments to Murphy's Laws
The First Amendment
If anything can go wrong it sometimes can and possibly will.
The Second Amendment
Thou shalt sometimes miss the first bus, and usually have to wait half an hour for the next one to arrive.
thurd amendamint
if zoo heet your zelf un ze heeed weeth a freyin paan zu weel bezomme stupeeder and stupderr. theiz waz foist tezsted ooon tha whitar oof thezi farticle pection.
[edit] Murphy's Paradox
Murphy's Law says that if anything can go wrong, it will. But, this stupid law applies to itself: itself can go wrong, that is, there must be a situation where something can go wrong and it won't go wrong. So, Murphy Law is paradoxal, and by reductio ad absurdun, it is bullshit.
Retrieved from "http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Murphy%27s_Law"
Ultima sexta...
Não só desta semana, mas também de trabalho durante algum tempo. E só faltam 4 dias de trabalho, e consequentemente, 9 dias para bazar deste marasmo!
Dia 1
Take Your Komodo Dragon To Work Day
1865 - Darth Maul brings balance to the Force
Dia 1
Take Your Komodo Dragon To Work Day
1865 - Darth Maul brings balance to the Force
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